Halloween Wednesday

Wednesdays are OB days. Now that Bean is into his third trimester of development, I have appointments every other Wednesday and there seems to be baby-related activity on the in between weeks - the glucose test last week and childbirth refresher class next week. Bridget came with me today and despite her misgivings, "No Mama go to doctor", it went very well. Bridget was sweet and adorable in her Cinderella dress (no reason not to let her wear it all day). My weight gain was good, Bean measured significantly larger than last visit, and the doctor told me that the numbers from my 3-hour glucose test were not only acceptable, they were extremely good. I'm very thankful and happy that Bean is doing so well. He's been kicking me all day to assure me of his good health.

This evening we took Bridget to my Dad's house for some trick-or-treating with her cousins. For those of you unfamiliar with the neighborhood in which I grew up, the houses are 1/4 mile apart or so and separated by fields of corn, hay, wheat, or beans. I'm related to most of the neighbors and my uncles own many of the aforementioned fields. Walking from house to house is not a viable option so we did as was done when I was young. Getting three adults and three children under three in and out of a vehicle is a tedious and time-consuming process. We stopped at the houses of the five nearest relatives and called it a night. I think it was just about right. The kids had fun without wearing out and the amount of candy remained within a reasonable limit.

An Accident-free Day

Today is the first day since we began potty training that Bridget has gone completely without an accident. It's a very happy change from yesterday when we cleaned up three puddles in two hours. These are the things that count as major accomplishments in my life!

Bridget is very excited about going trick-or-treating this week. She asks me to review the procedure nearly hourly, even though she knows it all by heart:

Mama: "First you..."
Bridget: "Put on your Cindinrella dress!"
M: "Then we..."
B: "Go a Papa's house!"
M: "Then what do we do?"
B: "Go knock-knock on a door."
M: "What do you say?"
B: "Trick er treat."
M: "Then what happens?"
B: " They give you CANDY!"
M" "Then..."
B: "Say thank you."

Relief

Yesterday I waited all day for a phone call that never came. I spent the evening researching gestational diabetes. This morning I got the call from my doctor's office and everything is fine. I am greatly relieved and, not for the first time, chagrined at expending so much energy worrying about something that never came to pass.

Another Wednesday

I was back at the doctor's office today. The results of last week's glucose tolerance screen were not good so I had to go back for a three hour fasting glucose tolerance test. The test itself went fine (the nurse was very good and make the four blood draws tolerable even for a needle-phobe like myself), but I'm more than a little nervous about the results. It may come back fine, or it may confirm that I have gestational diabetes. That would be bad enough for someone with my extreme attraction to all things sweet. The really bad news is that I would have to monitor my blood glucose level four times a day for the rest of the pregnancy. My fingers hurt just thinking about sticking myself so many times. Even worse than temporary monitoring is the fact that woman with gestational diabetes are at a much higher risk of developing diabetes later in life. That thought has me very bummed out. It's been a nagging fear of mine since long before this stupid test. I need a cookie.

Out of the Mouths of Babes...

For the past year or so, Bill and I have both been paying more attention to being Catholic. I doubt that most people would notice much of a change, but we're more attuned to church teachings than we were. There are many things about the Catholic church that were either ignored or glossed over in our cradle-Catholic education. Now that we're making an effort to learn more, some of the things we see at Mass seem jarringly out of place. What's really amazing is that Bridget has noticed the same things on two occasions.

A few weeks ago, they had lowered a projection screen above the alter to show a slide show during communion. Bill and I both thought it was a huge distraction from the main point of the solemn sacrifice of the Mass. Bridget noticed it as soon as we sat down. Her comment was "Where's Jesus?" referring to the large statue of the risen Christ that was covered up by the screen. She definitely got right to the point there.

Today we noticed that the hymn sung at the beginning of communion wasn't liturgically appropriate. It was a nice song and well preformed, but it didn't fulfill the role of a communion hymn as I have come to understand it. As Bridget put it when the song began, "Sounds like music at a big party!"

To remind you that she is an ordinary 2-year-old, you should also know that she thought there should be stickers in the basket when she took up her money for the children's collection.

Wednesday

Today is a nice day, a bit of blue sky in a week of rainy days. Bill went into work this morning so Bridget and I had the house to ourselves. We got ready for the day, cleaned a bathroom, and ran some errands. You wouldn't believe how difficult it is to find a kite in mid-October. Bridget saw someone flying a kite in a book and now she wants to "fly a kite with Mama." I hate to refuse such a request, but I can't find a kite anywhere! We took a trip to the park instead.

Bill came home for lunch so I could go to my appointment. It was fairly uneventful. I get the result of the glucose tolerance test tomorrow. Baby Bean's heartbeat was good, but he measures small even though I gained adequate weight this month. I'm not too surprised since Bridget measured small too but she was over 8 pounds. I go back in two weeks and they'll do another ultrasound if Bean* doesn't seem much bigger.

When I got home, Bridget was still napping and that seemed like a good idea to me too. Now I'm blogging and Bridget is sitting next to me watching Sesame Street clips on youtube. She already loves the computer. We'll have to keep an eye on her screen time as she gets older!


*For those of you who don't know, we don't intend to name our little boy "Bean," it's just how we refer to him for now. We haven't chosen a name yet and Bridget needed something to call him. It refers to the appearance of a baby at an early ultrasound - a little kidney bean shape with a flashing spot for a heart.

Mondy Roundup

The Cinderella dress is finished and Bridget was excited to see it. She caught sight of it this morning and wanted to wear it immediately. Since her breakfast oatmeal are almost ready to eat, we vetoed that and she settled for dancing around the room holding the dress. It was a reaction well worth my efforts! I worked today, but I hear her day went well with a trip to the park and one pair of panties lasting almost all day.

This week is busy at work. I'm lecturing on a complex topic (transport across the cell membrane is difficult for novices), giving a lab practical early in the week, and giving a lecture exam on Thursday. That means being more available to students and not taking time out to swim between classes. The first lab practical went well with a very respectable 76% average. Hopefully tomorrow's lab goes as smoothly.

Only 3 months until Baby Bean's due date. I have an OB appointment on Wednesday. I'm looking forward to it. Even when all signs indicate that the pregnancy is going well, it's nice to have periodic confirmation. I want to know that my weight gain is on track and that Bean's heartbeat is still strong. The Braxton-Hicks contractions are stronger and a lot earlier than with Bridget, but not out of the ordinary. I'm torn between wanting the next three months to be over so we can hold our baby boy and wanting them to last so I can continue to enjoy my private time with him and while he's so much easier to care for!

Domestic Day

The cool weather made me less than enthusiastic about leaving the house so I stayed in today. Bridget and I read a lot of stories, folded a lot of laundry, made a lot of visits to the potty (this is the first time she didn't wet her panties all day!), and had a rather unsuccessful naptime. This evening I worked on her Halloween costume. She wants to be Cinderella and she wants the custome ready right now. She wanted to wear it today and wasn't impressed when I told her that I still had to make it. "Sew it!" she demanded and I got to work. She was extremely interested and stayed pretty close (a little too close to the cutting scissors and sharp needles for my comfort) until bedtime. It's going well so far and it looks adorable. I can't wait to let her try it on once I get the skirt attached to the bodice.

The Week Continues

It's midweek with little to report. I don't work on Wednesdays so it's a bit like a mini-weekend. Like most weekends, I usually accomplish far less than I was hoping to. Today went pretty well. I did a little cleaning and I did got a lot of work done for my teaching next week. After tomorrow's lectures, it's time for the real weekend to start.

Waning Weekend

Another weekend is drawing to a close. There were some fun events and some chores accomplished, but not as many of either as I had hoped. I spent a lot of time either sleeping or wishing I was sleeping (like this morning when Bridget crawled into bed with me and began a long one-sided conversation that degenerated into giggles as she climbed all over her daddy).

Bill worked on Friday and I was out of sorts most of the day, but I did manage a little cleaning as well as the laundry. The evening improved with an impromptu visit to my dad's house. We had hot dogs for dinner and let the kids play until they were ready to drop. I also choose a couple items of my mom's to "borrow." I needed a gold chain to wear until my own jewelry is unearthed from basement storage and I wanted a couple holiday sweaters for this Christmas since mine are not going to fit over Baby Bean. Of course I have no intention of returning them. My dad has been trying for a while to get us to take anything we want, but it doesn't feel right to just walk into her closet and walk off with her things. So for now I'll think of it was borrowing something and it will eventually I'll consider it a gift from her to me.

Bill and I went out with a friend to see a movie. We saw 3:10 to Yuma, which was a pretty good movie, but I was frequently distracted by an inability to suspend my disbelief. There was way too little damage being done by way too many flying bullets. Bridget was very excited to join us for dinner at a restaurant, despite an unreasonable fear that every member of the waitstaff was going to take her drink or her dinner before she was finished.

Today we took Bridget to JoAnn's to choose fabric for her Halloween costume (she wants to be Cinderella, a costume for which I already have a pattern). We went a little too close to naptime so it was a bit of a trial, but we did accomplish the project. Bridget requested a picnic lunch with peanut butter sandwiches ("eat butter sammich on a blanket outside") and it was pleasant way to decompress a little before a late nap.

This afternoon Bill and I left Bridget with her Grandpa so we could go to a special service - a solemn high Mass said in the Latin Tridentine form. It was a new experience for me. It was a bit hard to follow for a non-Latin-speaker like myself, but it was a more peaceful and reflective Mass than the ordinary form. Or maybe I felt that way because I experienced an entire Mass without a two-year-old on my lap.

Symptomatic Resurgence

For some reason, the pregnancy symptoms have hit me really hard this week. It's odd because it's been pretty much business as usual since I got over the all-day morning sickness that characterized the month of June. This week I've been incredibly tired despite napping when possible, my previously diminishing craving for sweets has come back with a vengeance, I have to go to the bathroom all the time, I'm getting night-time leg cramps, my balance is off, and my mood swings like a two-year-old at the park.

Other than the emotional instability, I don't really mind much. It's nice to be reminded that I'm pregnant. There's nothing wrong with the extra rest, I usually manage to limit the treats to a much enjoyed snack in the evening, more trips to the bathroom remind me to ask Bridget if she needs to go, the leg cramps are a chance to practice labor breathing techniques, and I have a good reason to take the elevator instead of the stairs at work, and I can blame a combination of symptoms for why I have accomplished almost nothing this weekend.

Joy Not Untarnished

I'm glad to be pregnant. In fact, I'm thrilled to be pregnant. I enjoy it not only for the baby-to-be, but even for the experience itself. But this week has been big for reminding me that my joy may be very hard on others. I've read of the miscarriage of a much desired pregnancy and an adoption cut short by lack of funds. Closer to home, my sister is having a very hard time dealing with her divorce and the feeling of losing her children. Most personally, there is the association I have between pregnancy and my mom's death. It's hard not to be frustrated all over again that she's not here. Add to that the stress of a living arrangement and financial situation not particularly conducive to an additional family member and it's difficult to feel as happy as I'm sure I must be.

Saying the Wrong Thing

Sometimes we just say the wrong thing. I was trying to say the right things. I was trying to express care and concern and a positive attitude, but it all fell wrong on the ears of the person I was trying to encourage. It's not that anyone got angry. No one said anything mean or hurtful and we've both apologized that we weren't more sensitive to each other. But I feel like the conversation washed away all the common ground I've been trying to build for the past few years. Now we're stuck on opposite sides of a ravine. We can chat and smile and be there together, but no matter how I stretch, we can't quite reach each other. Were we ever close enough to touch or are the differences in our lives more than can be bridged? I feel lonely here on my side and I feel bad for stranding her on her side. So much for words; I don't think they're working here either.

Blog Personalities

Although I don't read many blogs, I've found that my virtual personality changes depending on the blog I'm reading. This might not affect those who lurk, but sometimes I can't keep from commenting. The tone of my comments varies from one blog to the next. When I'm reading my friend's blogs, I try to be amusing and affectionate. When in a Catholic blog, commenting is more difficult since it involved trying to say something meaningful and honest without triggering the judgement that I always fear is lurking for the well-meaning but less devout readers such as I see myself. I don't usually reply to posts on parenting, but I do file the information in my brain for later use.

The multiple personalities are easy enough to manage as a visit different blogs. Despite being logged in, comments feel very anonymous. All that is seen is the one personality I reveal to that blog's readership. What I haven't figured out is what to do with my own blog. It's not so safely anonymous and anyone could make their way from my comments to my profile to this blog. Who I am here would depend on who is reading, but I don't really know who that is. I guess I'll have to muddle through being myself.

Parenting Moments

There are so many things to consider with a bright two-year-old. It seems like every moment is a teaching moment of some sort: not only colors, letters, and shapes, but also politeness, hygiene, motor skills, behavior in church, table manners, listening to directions, potty training, and so much more. She learns so quickly that we can hardly keep up with her.

We were trying to wean her off the pacifier that she uses at bedtime, but our first attempt didn't work. A couple mom's recommended cutting off the end of the pacifier so we could let her have it, she just wouldn't want it. The first couple nights were heartbreaking as she cried "have a broke mimi," and "get a better mimi." I felt as mean as if I'd torn the head off her favorite stuffed animal. Then she adapted and now she comments once that it's broken, then uses it anyway.

We're just letting it go for now as we embark on the much more important and time consuming adventure of potty training. For week's she's been sitting on the potty regularly, but nothing has happened. Today's diapers are just too absorbent for kids to learn what it feels like to go potty. After a couple days in cloth training panties, I think she's starting to get it. Not only did she figure out how to pee in the potty, but today she actually told her daddy before she went instead of as she was wetting her panties. I'm sure there's still a lot of changes of clothes ahead, but we just might have this well in hand by the time her baby brother arrives.

Literacy is a Prerequisite

Do my students not read the syllabus or do they just assume it doesn't apply to them? I had four students miss the exam I gave to today. Two of them have emailed to make arrangements to make up the exam. The syllabus clearly states (and I clearly stated on the first day of class) that the lowest exam score is dropped so there are NO makeup exams. I am actually a very sympathetic person so I do not enjoy these moments of holding the hard line.

If mine was a meaningful blog, I would go on to discuss this phenomenon in the larger world with examples of people acting above the rules. I can't say I've never done it myself and I'm a pretty compulsive rule follower in most situations. Thankfully, this isn't that kind of blog, so I'll leave the topic and return to the minutia of my daily life.

Otherwise the day went well. My students finished their exams early so I got some extra time in the pool. My endurance and my form are improving but the best part is the marvelous relaxation of weightlessness that will only get better as I get bigger. It makes it worthwhile to spend twice as long in the locker room as I do in the water (the disadvantage to having to swim between classes instead of at the end of the day).